Most metropolitan daily newspapers have a film critic, and one day per week some kind of aggregate reviews on films just opening. From time to time, the reader will note a “box” with the film and the line “not made available for advance screening”. You can just about count on this being a lousy film from a source hoping to get in-and-out for a decent first week gross before word-of-mouth sinks the ship.

Such is “Priest”, which views Earth as a divided land, the major part controlled by vampires, a smaller part by Priests, who all tend to be super-human, but don’t expect Bela Legosi or the cast of the “Twilight trilogy”. When these attack, they turn into slimy animal-shaped forms intended to be repulsive. In my 82 years, I have seen over 30,000 movies, so obviously I’ve seen everything, the good and the bad. My definition of a “good movie” is one that delivers to the audience for which it is intended.

Believe me, this is one of the worst. Shut the lens setting down; make it be dark and fuzzy and it will seem ominous. The set pieces are ridiculous, and exercise in “what were they thinking”. “The Priest” should not have gotten beyond a discarded script. But, of course, as a supposed “horror film”, it is making money.